No, seriously. I didn’t want to write today. Already I have gone through three or four possible topics. Yet none of them captured my interest enough to actually write about it. Now I know sometimes we have to write about things we don’t like, but usually, something catches my interest enough to write a little. Today, nothing caught my interest.
What Do I Do?
What do I do when I don’t want to write and still need to do it? I’m still figuring that out. First, when I start thinking of a subject, I research it. Once I have researched everything I need, I can usually put something together. Today, not even that worked.
Instead, today, I tried to start three different topics after doing research. Still, nothing flowed and I could not write. Knowing I would probably feel like writing about these topics on another day, I saved my research and moved on. Funny enough, the only topic I feel like writing about is how I don’t want to write today.
Why am I struggling so hard today? Why did nothing catch my interest? Honestly, the answer to those two questions has the same answer. Right now, I’m struggling to find interests. Every once in a while, I get some typical depression issues. Nothing interests me. I don’t want to do anything and would rather sleep.
I can’t go back to sleep and ignore the world because I have responsibilities. Specifically, I have three children that might survive the day without me, but not without lots of fights. Second, my dog had her vet appointment. These reasons dragged me out of bed.
With all this disinterest, why do the writing today? Why not skip it? Honestly, I thought about skipping. Then, I realized I had made a commitment to myself to really try and continue this blog. That means I can’t skip normal days just because I don’t want to write. If I did that then I would go back to only writing in bursts.
No, I want to continue to write. This blog allows me an outlet for my creativity. It helps me feel like me, rather than always Mom, Housekeeper, Taxi, Clown, Circus Ring Master, and more. Sometimes, I want to feel human, so I write even when I struggle. No, I didn’t want to write today, but I did it anyway. I may fail in many things but in this, I can succeed.